From the Pastor’s Desk (66)
It’s exciting to see more and more New Lifers are finding the love of their lifetime and tying the knot! I am hoping that there would be at least a half dozen weddings taking place this year. If God hasn’t called you to be celibate He will surely provide you with a Christ-honoring spouse if you patiently wait upon Him and serve Him faithfully.
This is still the beginning of 2002 and I would like to share with you some of my thoughts for your wedding celebration. These are just my personal suggestions and recommendations that I believe would be good for you.
First, enjoy your wedding preparation by not taking it too seriously. We all have seen people who began their wedding preparation way in advance, and in the course of it, became too stressed. Please remember that a picture perfect wedding ceremony doesn’t guarantee a happy marriage! There are many couples in New Life whose wedding ceremonies were not spectacular compared to today’s standard. However, they are building and experiencing a solid and healthy marriage. Don’t get your cues from Martha Stewart. Get them from God and His Word!
Second, lower your standard a little to save money for your marriage. Money is one of the major causes for conflict in marriage. Knowing this, I think it would be wise if we don’t start our marriage with any kind of debt. I was told that it takes about $20-30,000 to get married these days. Some of you are blessed by God financially and this is not a big figure for you. Many of us, however, are not as well off and we don’t have that kind of money or luxury to spend it on a one-day event, though special it is. If you reduce the size of the ring (and I sincerely apologize to our ladies for this! But we will have huge, brilliant ones in heaven! J), have a little bit smaller wedding party, lessen the number of wedding pictures and go to a little less exotic place for your honeymoon, I know you can save not a small amount of money. Just a thought!
Third, have just one reception to include and allow your parents’ friends to bless your marriage and celebrate your wedding. I don’t know how it all got started, but it’s becoming a common practice for people to have two receptions: one for the parents’ friends and another for their friends. This was of necessity perhaps to some but it is a bit unfortunate, especially for older people. What they often get after the ceremony is food and a quick greeting from the bride and groom. Then, they go home. Some may be busy and that’s what they do. Others who came from far and close to bless and congratulate you want to stick around. They want to see your slides, see you giving a huge chunk of cake to each other, see you taking that garter from the bride’s secret place, see who gets the bouquet. In other words, they want to celebrate your wedding together with you! Our gym is an ideal place to do this. It’s big and spacious. There is room for everyone. With the money you would have spent on hotel food, you could decorate it to your heart’s desire! I even spoke up and obtained permission from the deacons so that you can dance on the floor. Paul Keating can make that floor for us and you all can dance on it!
Fourth, if your wedding is on Saturday, do your best to come to church on Sunday to worship God before you go on your honeymoon. This is a symbolic gesture on your part to say to God that He is the number one priority in your life and He is the central figure in your marriage. You will also get some needed rest after the wedding by not rushing into your honeymoon.
Lastly, don’t forget your friends and family members who helped you out with your wedding ceremony. Without them, your wedding ceremony wouldn’t have been possible. Express your deep gratitude not only verbally but also through thoughtful letters or by having a get together at your place soon after your honeymoon.
I hope this will be food for thought as you prepare for your wedding in the near future!
Your pastor,
Eric
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